Monday, July 14, 2008

A Weekend at the Park

For the first time in a loooonnnnngggggg time, I spent the weekend taking in an entire series for the Phils, and let me tell you something, this three-gamer with the Diamondbacks was a microcosm for the Phillies' season thus far: exciting, frustrating and up and down.



Friday night, after kicking back quite a few in the parking lot (my office closed at 4, so I got there a bit early), I entered CBP expecting a close game. I certainly got that, and it was in typical Phils fashion. Ryan Howard got the Phils on the board first, hitting one of patented opposite field home runs to continue his scorching July.

Then right on cue, the Phils gave it right back in the sixth, but answered with two of their own in the bottom of the inning to go up 3-1. But as has been their MO of late, the Phils gave it right back in the seventh, as Kendrick left after six and a third with four across.

After tacking on another in the eighth, it looked as though Arizona was going to steal the opener. I was bitching at some guy for yelling at me for "cursing" when all of the sudden up comes Victorino with two on in the eighth. Shane, who I recently dropped from my fantasy team (sorry), came up clutch, ripping a two-run triple to tie the game. I was pumped.

But, that horrible feeling still overcame me. The Phils have been floundering of late, while the Mets have been tearing it up, and I pictured that extra inning loss to the Mets last week. Luckily for me, Jayson Werth had other plans, getting the game-winning hit in the 12th. A little too close for comfort with some guy named Doug Davis on the hill, but a good start to the series nonetheless.



And then Saturday happened. Now, when my friend called to tell me he had an extra ticket, believe me, I penciled in a loss. Even if Randy Johnson was 85, not 65, I'd still bet on him to outpitch Adam Eaton any day of the week. But shit, I didn't expect this: 3 2/3 IP, 7 hits, 8 runs, all of them earned and three walks. Seriously Charlie, you manned up with Myers. Now it's officially time. Adam Eaton should never, ever, in a million years, see the mound in a major league ballpark again. Last season, he finished with the highest ERA in the majors for any starting pitcher, and this year, he's just as bad, if not worse.



Since the Phils have signed him, he has been the single worst starting pitcher in Major League Baseball. Mark my words, if Adam Eaton starts another game for the Phils this season, no matter when, where or how, they will not make the playoffs. He is a disgrace not only to this city, but to the art of pitching. There is no possible way anyone can convince me that there aren't at least two or three arms in Philadelphia's minor league system that could do better than Eaton. He fucking blows. Gillick should be punched in the balls repeatedly every morning for signing this no-talent jerk. Or maybe the Phils should sign this guy.



On another note to Saturday's 10-4 debacle of a loss, Chase Utley should not be sitting with the Mets charging hard and the All Star break right around the corner. That's horrible managing no matter how you look at it. Utley actually hits lefties. Bruntlett actually hits nothing. Ever. Also, how did Swindle ever even get called up? Seriously? I covered high school baseball. Fifty percent of those pitchers, if not more, can throw harder than him. He's nothing more than a batting practice pitcher.

It was fucking hot on Saturday, and watching that game almost caused me a heat stroke. If it wasn't for Shane's 3-for-3 and two homers, I seriously might have done something terrible.

Thank heavens my roommate notified me he was taking me to yesterday's marquee matchup between Cole and Webb. While I did bake in the sun like a lobster in left field, the game was fantastic. Cole, while not on top of his game (see 11 hits), pitched out of jams and kept the Phils close, even when he wasn't hitting all his spots. Webb, through six innings, looked like the NL Cy Young Award winner that he is, only surrendering one run on a, believe it or not, RBI double by Hamels. But in the seventh, Jimmy finally came through with a big hit (one that will hopefully get him rolling), tying the game and chasing Webb off the mound.

With the game tied, and my entire section chanting, "YOU SUCK, JACKSON!" every inning, serenading Conor Jackson in left, the game was getting really fun. Hell, even Jackson was embracing it, laughing and dancing along. And things got even better when Pat showed everyone he deserved to be an All Star, crushing a 3-run home run that put the Phils ahead. Thanks to Pete Happy's solo shot two batters later, Lidge has some wiggle room, and the Phils closed out the series with a 6-3 win to stay a half game ahead of the stinking Mets.

It was a wonderful weekend at The House That Glanville Built, and the Phils somehow remain in first with all eyes on The House That Ruth Built the next few days. Here's hoping Chase can give the Phils yet another home run derby win, and that taking two of three from the Diamondbacks to close out the first half will catapult them back into a hot streak. They'll need it with New York nipping at their heals.

And fuck Adam Eaton. He sucks. Jackass is just stealing money. That is all.

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