Hating People for No Good Reason … and Links

Generally, the people I work with seem like very well-intentioned, genuinely nice people. For the most part, I get along with them and even, occasionally, will go grab a beer with a few of them after work or at lunch.

But then there's the other side of me, the side that really, truly despises a few of my co-workers, and honestly, there's no good reason for it. There are two people in particular, who are actually in my group, that I just can't stand. Really, I'm not sure completely why. Both of them seem reasonable nice. But for some reason, every time I see them, I just want to punch them right in the face.



In fact, the more I think about it, the one deserves it. This individual always tries to drag everyone into a pointless conversation about stupid shit while I'm just hitting trying to sit here and work (or avoid work, whichever the case may be). Hey, lady, shut the fuck up already! You're weird. You're ugly. And no one wants to talk to you. Damn.

The other person, well, that individual really doesn't deserve my disdain, but it's there anyway. Perhaps it's the way this person looks. Has to be. That's why I hate a bunch of other people in this office I don't even know. Especially the old, fat guy who always talks in the bathroom very loudly and makes very odd, disturbing noises when he takes a piss. Fuck that guy. Die already.

Anyway, let's make with the links …

-I'm really digging the Today in Philly Sports History work Andrew is doing at The700Level. Well, 31 years ago today, the 76ers drafted Maurice Cheeks.



Cheeks, who won an NBA title and is among the all-time leaders in assists and steals, deserves to be in the Hall of Fame. Someone make this happen.

-Black men can jump:



-This 8-year-old got game:



-Gee, I would have never guessed it: Scottie Reynolds is returning to Villanova for his senior season.

-Something tells me Wilt didn't really drive this car:



-Well, well, well, looks like the Phillies are finally taking my advice and placing Brad Lidge on the 15-day DL to get his sore knee in check, and, presumably, his shit back together.



All right, Ryan Madson. Let's see what you got. Oh, and Paul Bako will be taking Lidge's place on the active roster for the time being.

-Well Sixers fans, we got our shooter.

According to NBA sources the team is expected to announce this afternoon a deal sending sharp-shooter Jason Kapono to the Philadelphia 76ers for bruising forward Reggie Evans.

Makes sense. With the emergence of Marreese Speights along with the return of Elton Brand and my movie buddy Jason Smith, not to mention Sammy Dalembert still around, Reggie Evans was more than dispensable. And in the process, the Sixers got not just a good shooter, but one of the best pure shooters in the NBA.



Welcome to Philadelphia, Jason. Guess this means the Sixers are definitely drafting a point guard now.

-A brilliant take on the fact that Jimmy Rollins, despite sucking worse than Pat Burrell at his lowest point at the plate, leads the NL All-Star voting at short:

Who cares if right now he’s the worst short stop in the league when it comes to swinging a bat? Who cares if he’s dead last among shortstops in OBP (.261!), third from last in SLG (. 322), only has 77 total bases so far with only 12 walks and 27 strikeouts? Who cares that in spite of his awful, awful performance there isn’t another shortstop with as many plate appearances him? Who cares about any of this bullshit? Not me.

Who cares that the Marlins’ Hanley Ramirez leads him in every meaningful offensive statistical category including HRs, 2Bs, BBs, BA, OBP, SLG–even RBI and runs if you care about that? Who’s ever heard of Hanley Ramirez? Not us. His name sounds like a trendy micro brew. We drink Bud Light in America, am I right?

Seriously, this is why fans should not be allowed to decide anything. Fans are stupid, horrible people. And there are moronic, jerk, asshole people I know, like Arkkansas Fred, who just vote for Phillies or their favorite players, not guys who deserve it. People who only vote for players on their favorite team are fucking awful human beings who should be hanged.

Chase Utley and Raul Ibanez are the only two Phillies worthy of starting. Maybe Carlos Ruiz, but only because the National League catchers suck collective donkey balls. Jimmy Rollins shouldn't even be allowed to watch the All-Star game on television, let alone get to be a part of the team, especially as a God damn starter. You people make me sick.

-Fred Smoot wants to a professional bowler.



I used to hate Fred Smoot so much because I thought he was incredibly overrated, hyped himself up to be better than he actually is and of course, he played/plays for the Redskins. But the older the both of us get, the more I love Fred Smoot. He's hilarious, seems to really enjoy the game, and now, everyone knows he is nowhere as good as he and everyone else once thought he was.

"75 percent of the world is covered by water. The rest is covered by Fred Smoot."

And tonight, for your view pleasure, there's a whole heap of games to watch, overlapping into a very nice little sports night. It begins as J.A. Happ takes on Johan at 7:10 in ShittyCitifield for the beginning of a three-game set between the Phils and Mets. Then, the Red Wings will try to close out the Pens in game 6 of the Stanley Cup Finals in Pittsburgh starting at 8, and game 3 of the NBA Finals begin at 9 in Orlando.

And seriously people, stop fucking voting for Jimmy Rollins. It's not right.

And Then There Were Four … Links

The Final Four is tomorrow. Villanova, North Carolina, UConn, Michigan State. Nothing more really needs to be added to that. Oh, and the Phillies start Sunday, so there's that too, and the Bears decide to mortgage their future to get Jay Cutler. Seriously, the Broncos received two first round picks, a third rounder and Kyle Orton. Wow. Now the links.

-Classic, the Norm MacDonald ESPY monologue:



-The Phillies prop bets.

-USC linebackers love the roids.

-Some love for Dante Cunningham.



He'll definitely be a big key, but all of the Wildcats are going to have to play a near perfect game to beat UNC.

-Shoals offers his five non-stories from this year's NBA season. Guess who's mentioned first:

Brand on the Run: Baron Davis' relocation was an unquestioned disaster; Jermaine O'Neal's, a little less cataclysmic, but a major failure that proved he had forever dropped a tier or two. On the bright side, Ron Artest has been absolutely crucial to Houston's late season resurrection, and Corey Maggette has played quite well for a team from outer space.

But perhaps no offseason acquisition was a bigger deal than Elton Brand to the Sixers. Here, a young, uptempo team was getting one of the league's most steady, productive post players. But this ideal pairing never came to fruition. Brand struggled, the Sixers struggled, Brand was hurt, the Sixers went back to their old ways without him, and it was a mercy killing when in February Elton decided to undergo surgery and sit for the year. Now the Sixers are the fifth seed in the East, and Brand is a distant memory who might as well have never happened.

-Joe Juliano talks about Scottie Reynolds' difficulty adjusting to life at Villanova.

-Dick Jerardi had a great piece on Jay Wright earlier in the week.



The best line in the article, however, is delivered by Rick Pitino:

I will never forget Rick Pitino saying at the 1997 Final Four: "If it's not broken, break it," not the old cliché "if it ain't broke, don't fix it."

This line came from a man who had won the 1996 title and would lose the 1997 title game in overtime. Stand still, he was saying, and you will get passed.

-NBA scouts should not only be looking at the players on the floor at the Final Four, says Kevin Arnovitz, they should be looking at Jay Wright:

Jay Wright, 47 years old, Head Coach, Villanova
On a team full of marginal pros, the one name from Villanova that NBA fans should be aware of is actually that of their head coach, Jay Wright. Watch the difference in his offense this weekend-chock full of NBA friendly isolation plays, heavily focused on outstanding spacing-compared with that of Michigan State, UConn or North Carolina, and notice the difference. His team doesn't shoot particularly well, and they aren't very big, long or athletic. They lack a true point guard, a real center, any kind of depth at all in the frontcourt, and may not have even a single future NBA player on their roster.

So what are they even doing on this stage?

The answer to that is their head coach: Jay Wright. When NBA GMs go to scout the Final Four this weekend, they'll obviously be taking notes on their star players, Dante Cunningham and Scottie Reynolds. But they should also be keeping tabs on the man running the show from Villanova's bench.

Wright looks like the most likely head coach in the NCAA right now to be able to successfully make the transition to coaching in the NBA. Even though his team runs a traditional 4-out 1-in motion offense, he gives his players an unbelievable amount of freedom to go out and make plays on their own if they feel like they have an advantage. Even if they aren't the most talented group of players, Wright has made them into an extremely disciplined, unselfish bunch who are about as well-prepared a team as you'll find.

Everyone who has been around Wright mentions his charisma and ability to build and maintain relationships as the key to his success. Even if he obviously looks the part, he's much more than just a smooth talker. He knows how to manage his players and get the absolute most out of them, often by making quick changes on the fly, and is not a control freak, an ego-maniac or a disciplinarian, like many other failed college-to-pro experiments. When he asks his team to go out and spit blood in order to get him stops on the defensive end-a huge key to their success-- they do it, because they have a tremendous amount of respect for him. Would NBA players respect his authority in a similar way? There's only one way to figure that out.

-Johan Frazen is Superman:



-Just an absolutely incredible trick shot:



-Here's another one, via MLJ:


EMBED-Amazing Off-the-Wall Bball Swish - Watch more free videos

-It has to be fun having Fred Smoot and Gilbert Arenas in the same town. Check out some brilliant quotes by Smoot and Gilbert from the Bog:

"Fat boys wins my game," he said. "I know football, and in December, in the playoffs, fat boys win. Whoever's got the best fat boys is gonna win, so I'm gonna collect fat boys. I can find Fred Smoots--not a dime a dozen, but I can find cornerbacks that can make plays. I can find that. I can't find a big boy that can push this line for four quarters."

Fred Smoot, if you haven't noticed, is actually pretty smart, underneath all the jibba jabba. So is Gilbert Arenas; his "a broke clock's right twice" line, concerning the sorry Wizards recording two wins this year against the dominant Cavs, was probably the smartest five words anyone uttered about last night's game, and he delivered it spontaneously, without a second's thought.

-Finally, someone is is talking some sense:

Since we're both picking the Phillies to win this division for a third season in a row, can we safely say that we're employing a "fool me once ..." stance toward those Mets?

David Brown: The Mets just ain't that good, 'Duk! Daniel Murphy might be OK in left field. Ryan Church is OK in right. Luis Castillo is barely OK at second. Brian Schneider is OK behind the plate. The starting pitching is OK after Johan Santana. The bullpen will light you on fire just as soon as they pitch, and that includes Francisco Rodriguez. Just start the count 2-1, because K-Rod usually gets there anyway. The Mets have great players at third, at short, in center and on the mound every fifth day. The rest of them make me shrug my shoulders. Heck, can I put the Marlins second?

Exactly.

-Just please, go over to Big Five Post and read all the great work Dom is doing, for instance, a look back at '85, Dante, Dionte and Ahmad receiving All American Honorable Mention honors, and an exhaustive list of Villanova links from the week.

Oh, and it would be nice if the Flyers came out and won 6-0 or something tonight, seeing as they completely shit the bed against Toronto on Wednesday.

Craptastic

That's the best way to describe last night's game between the Giants and Redskins. It was truly one of the most pathetic, horrifying games in recent memory. The good news for Eagles fans: The Giants didn't look very good after the midway point of the 2nd quarter, and the Redskins flat-out suck. The Birds just might have a chance in this thing.

The thing about last night's game is it got off to a terrible start for us Eagles fans. The Giants were absolutely mopping the floor with the Redskins. Eli looked like Joe Montana, and Plaxico was simply abusing Fred Smoot. Note to Fred Smoot: 70 percent of the world may be covered by water and the rest by Fred Smoot, if you say so, but you still suck.



It looked as though the Giants were going to run away with things, but then a funny thing happened. They turned into the 2007 Philadelphia Eagles. And by that I mean they couldn't score a touchdown to save their lives. By the graces of God, the Redskins were down just 16-0 in a game that felt like it was 35-0. Then, another miracle occurred, with Jason Campbell actually orchestrating a last-minute drive for a touchdown right before half to make it a 16-7 game.

And oh by the way, Jim Zorn is a fucking horrible coach. His clock management at the end of the first half, not calling a timeout when he had all fucking three of them, was worse than Andy Reid's clock management skills. It was horrible. He got lucky as shit his team scored. What a moron.



The second half was a complete waste of time. Both teams looked like the fucking Atlanta Falcons. And once again, with the Skins down two scores and four minutes left, Jim Zorn refused to get his team in the no huddle offense and even continued to run the damn ball … and time quickly ran out on this pathetic Washington team.

My synopsis for the game: Plaxico is a beast. Justin Tuck is a bigger beast. Jason Taylor sucks. Jason Campbell sucks even more. Where was Chris Cooley? And Jim Zorn is by far the stupidest coach I have ever seen in the history of the world, at least as far as game management and calling plays is concerned. And I've watched Andy Reid. For a decade. That's a scary thought.

The best thing coming out of this game—watching Brandon Jacobs absolutely destroy people, specifically the hard-hitting LaRon Landry.





That game absolutely blew donkey balls, but it was still better than watching the Phillies blow another game. Football is back. In a big way. And after one game, it looks like the Giants and Redskins suck. Sounds good to me. The NFL, it's FANtastic.