Monday, August 24, 2009

My Secret Admirer Links

Today, I got an email with the subject line: SECRETS. The good old Gmail account for this here site informed me that the message was from someone named Lecha Hampton. I do not know anyone named Lecha Hampton, and frankly, it sounds made up.

The message read: I love your blog. Your identity is not a secret. You look much better in person. Have a wonderful day stranger. I have been up way too long. It was a very long weekend.

Chances are this is just a nonsense email from one of my stupid friends to confuse the hell out of me. Mission accomplished. I have no idea who Lecha Hampton is or who the potential culprit of this fake email could be, so any information from anyone who may or may not know of a Lecha Hampton's existence or the funny guy who is playing a joke on the dear Reverend would be much appreciated. Thank you.

Let's get some links …

-This video would be much more enjoyable if Josh Hull was edited out:

-This video, on the other hand, is perfect just the way it is:

-Abe Koroma is transferring to Western Illinois.

-Dante Cunningham is signed, sealed and delivered with Portland.

-Michael Beasley has checked in to rehab.

-KG dunk mix, just because:

-Newsflash: Cole Hamels sucks this year:

But after Hamels allowed 10 hits and four runs in five innings in last night's 4-2 loss to the Mets, he is 7-8 with a 4.78 ERA.

That's the fifth-highest ERA in the National League. Only Livan Hernandez (5.47 ERA), Jamie Moyer (5.22 ERA), Ricky Nolasco (5.22 ERA) and Braden Looper (4.95 ERA) are higher.

His .285 opponents average is ninth highest in the league.

True story: On Friday night, I went to see Inglourious Basterds, which is awesome by the way, and during the movie, Adam EatShit sent me this text message: "Cole is a bitch"

-Know why you should never leave a game early? Because you could miss an unassisted triple play to end the game, that's why. Oh, and also, because the game got pretty close there. Pathetic display of fandom.

-What would us college football fans do without the genius of the U?

Orange on one side, green on the other side indeed.

-Don't call it a comeback.

-Why the Eagles suck:

2. Hey, Andy Reid's still coaching this team, right? Remember, this is a guy who failed to inform his star quarterback last year that games can end in ties. Not only is Andy Reid a poor game manager, he's an AGGRESSIVELY POOR game manager. Not only will he end up fucking up the game, but he'll fuck it up by using the most illogical strategy he can possibly devise. More importantly, he will take hours upon hours to implement that strategy. For the Eagles, huddling during the last two minutes of a game isn't an option, it's fucking mandatory. It's just the kind of team-building exercise that can really help Reid's men cope with the agony of losing yet another 4-point game that ended with Brian Westbrook getting stuffed on a power rushing play that he wasn't well-suited for.

So Philly can bring in all the fancy new skill position players they like. They won't be poised to do the team much good when there's 90 seconds left and the team is STILL FUCKING HUDDLING when everyone at the bar is shouting at the TV, "WHY THE FUCK ARE THEY STILL HUDDLING? ARE THEY FUCKING RETARDED?!" That's the true legacy of Andy Reid. It takes a special kind of coach to make every random asshole in the bar feel like they could do a better job AND be correct in just such an assumption. Worst of all, Jim Johnson is gone, and not around to be the all-purpose coverall for Reid's numerous, glaring fuckups.

-Dodge ball, Utah-style:

-And just for shits and giggles, a dogfighting ring was busted in Germantown. No word yet on the involvement of Michael Vick. Or inspiration. Or something like that.

Finally, as I publish this, the Phillies are up 5-2 in the top of the 7th, led by the two-headed monster of Ryan Howard and Cliff Lee. Howard driven in all five runs with a three-run homer in the first and a 2-run homer in the third. He's a beast. Meanwhile, Cliff Lee has gone 6 innings, giving up 5 hits and striking out four. He also did allow 2 runs, but both are unearned, shrinking his already miniscule ERA to 0.69 as of the beginning of the 7th. The guy is good.

BallHype: hype it up!


  1. Joe,

    Lecha here ;)! I just love how you talk such nonsense on this here blog! I also love your hairy, sexy, tight bod! Call me sometime, my # is 555-2424!

    Truly yours,

    Your not-so-secret admirer

  2. Who the hell is Joe. And who the hell is Lecha? What is this?

  3. Like your the only joe in the area.

  4. Cliff Lee is a fucking monster. I'm starting to wonder if he's human...

    Funny you posted something about Miami. Ed wrote a post about the 'Canes yesterday. Pretty good stuff.

  5. Yeah, saw Ed's post. I can't get enough Miami rap

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