You'll Always Remember Your First Time, Part 24

They say you never forget your first time. And with October upon us, the vivid memories of my first time witnessing a professional Philadelphia franchise win a championship are ripe in my head. Even with football underway, I find myself wandering back to that glorious month of October, 2008. It's something I want to relive again and again. In fact, that's exactly what I'm going to do, republishing my feelings during the wild ride to becoming 2008 World Fucking Champions. View part 1 here, part 2 here, part 3 here, part 4 here, part 5 here, part 6 here, part 7 here, part 8 here, part 9 here, part 10 here, part 11 here, part 12 here, part 13 here, part 14 here, part 15 here, part 16 here, part 17 here, part 18 here, part 19 here, part 20 here, part 21 here, part 22 here and part 23 here.

Today is part 24, originally published Oct. 28, 2008, by uncle jellyfish:

A Word to the Wise

Look. If you've watched the game with a small group of friends for the last month, don't stop. If you think to yourself, "Yeah, we've just been at the corner bar all these weeks but tonight, I'm going to go to the Fieldhouse to get nuts," DON'T. For those of you who don't need a crowd to get into a game, stick to your guns.

What I'm talking about is worst move I've made in a while, the one to go down to Benny the Bums tonight to watch game 5. Why not be 400 yards from the very Park the Phils could win it all in? Why not be that much closer to what could possibly be the best moment of my 27 years?

How could that be a bad move?

That would be because apparently this bar (and I assume many others) was filled with a bunch of fuckfaces who were more concerned with getting 6 miller lites for them and their dbag cronies than watching the game. This is because I had to piss in an empty pitcher as if I left my spot I may never regain an angle on a TV. This is because a 2-2 count with nobody on and no out was no different than a full count with 2 out to most of the clueless patrons.

I swear to god if I ever hear another DJ do a "mash-up" of Metallica and some fucking dance beat...words cannot describe the anger that built up. Not that Metallica is that good, it's just that Enter Sandman and Disco Inferno just don't mix. I hate you, douche that was DJ'ing at Benny the Bums Monday night. You truly led me to believe I was in a frat basement waiting for my division 2 football team to get back from their game so we could slam Jacob's Best. You suck hard man.

If you want to watch the game with people who care, watch the game with people you know who care. If you don't, you'll end up a stone's throw from the stadium with a bunch of assholes singing 'sweet caroline' before the game, just waiting to blindly cheer if the Phils win.


All that said- this is the most confounding result that could have possibly happened tonight. I hope they get some type of resolution Tuesday and the Phils are able to pull it out. These hijinks from Mother Nature clearly favor the Rays, as they dodged a bullet from a locked-in Colbert Hamels. LET'S GO PHILS whenever this game is finished.

P.S. Fuck Bud Selig for good measure.