Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Myers Officially a Pig … Iron Pig That Is

Looks like the Phillies took a page right out of Mr. Myers' book, bitch-slapping the opening day starter all the way down to the minor leagues.

I'm not gonna lie, I've been advocating Myers' demotion for about a month now, but I figured it would be to the bullpen, not the minor leagues. Don't get me wrong, right now he's pitching like a minor-leaguer, but as a friend of mine at work pointed out, how the hell does this help the Phils or Myers?

Best case scenario would be to trade Myers. Certainly, his stock is at an all-time low, but he could have value as a reliever. Shit, he did one hell of a job as the closer last year, and this picture will be an enduring memory for quite some time:

Now, he has absolutely no shot at the closer role, with Lidge being lights out and, you know, his penchant for sucking this year. But he'd be an excellent choice as a long reliever, and with the array of pitches he has, he could be a strong setup man as well. So why send HIM down to the minors? What about, say, Clay Condrey, a guy who really doesn't pitch unless the Phils are down six runs?

The move is confusing as hell to me, but I don't feel sorry to Brett. In fact, I'm elated to have him out of the rotation. I mean, when you can't outpich the 100-year-old Jamie Moyer or even compete on the level of Kyle Kendrick, who has unspectacular stuff, you need a swift kick to the ass. And the fact that you are without question worse than Adam Eaton this year isn't helping anything.

Here's hoping you get your act together, Brett. Otherwise, I propose you be forced to being tied up in a room, legs and hands bound, as your wife repeatedly tees off on you with a bat like opposing batters have done to your fastball this year.

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