Monday, September 29, 2008

The Greatest Minute of the Weekend

Now, Saturday was by far a tremendous day. Absolutely Incredible if you will. Between the Phillies winning the National League East, or as Tim McCarver put it, the National League Division of the East, and Penn State beating up on Illinois, it was a great day. Aside from all that, there was one minute that made Saturday that much better. Now, we have told you about the three idiots in front of us at the Penn State games, who have been dubbed Brokeback by Rev. Paul's cousin.

Well, with an 8 o'clock game, I figured they would be worse than before with a national tv game and a chance for them to try to get on television, which is all they seem to care about. Around game time two of them, short stubby-fingered fat guy and child-molesting looking mustached guy, come walking up in full painting suits to protect them from the weather. Not only did they have these horrible-looking one-piece suit things on and their trademark, pathetic cowboy hats, they decided to spray paint "Penn State Football Rocks" on the back of their outfits. Totally cool idea. I was instantly tempted to stab them in the faces. Although on a positive note, their younger flaming friend was nowhere to be found. So right away, they were down a pathetic man. After one PSU td, and a chance for them to "press" a young kid in the air to try and get on tv, the best moment of Saturday happened.

The young Flaming member of Brokeback came walking towards the seats obviously drunk and he seemed a bit cranky. He walked up to their aisle and starts yelling at old weird Mustache guy, "YOU!!!, Yeah You! Down there, now! Come down there now! YOU!"

At that point, the other two looked at each other and and did not respond to their angry, homosexual friend. Which prompted they angry gay man to yell some more, "YOU!, YEAH YOU! You want to do this in front of all these people, right now, or down there!?! I'll do it right here!" At that point a man in the aisle made a comment towards the guy, which he responded with, "You shut the Fuck UP!" He may have snapped his finger in a Z pattern as well, I am not positive. At that point creepy Mustache got up and left with the distraught not so Gay, and by gay i mean happy, man and never returned again. They were gone the rest of the game, leaving stubby-fingered fat guy by himself with no friends around. It was a glorious minute sequence that gave us glorious hours of laughter afterwards and shed some light on Brokeback.

These are proven facts about the three douchebags. They are in fact douchebags. Two of them are homosexuals, not that there is anything wrong with that at all but it gives you a better idea about who they are.

The two homosexuals are in fact gay lovers with a very rocky relationship. The other member of their group should consider suicide. The other two should also consider suicide. It is not all right to stand up every time a team scores and point in the direction of a first down and to try and get on tv. They believe getting on tv is more important than the game itself. They enjoy the wave. The wave is stupid. Anyone who does the wave, especially while the home team is on offense, should be kicked out of the stadium [Ed Note: Espeicially in a fucking 7-point game, in the second half, when Illinois just scored and your team has the ball, you stupid fucking students!]. They ruin the game for fans that come to support their team and are diehard fans. I hate these people very much.

Side note: At one point fatty tried high-fiving me after a missed field goal and I refused to even look towards him, snubbing him and leaving him holding his hand in the air like an idiot. I wish the same could have been said about Rev Paul a few weeks ago.

Also, Penn State's nickel defense is very annoying. Evan Royster will be the career rushing leader before his career is over. That was horrible play calling by the Eagles last night. The defense did a good enough job to win the game. Donovan did not run the ball once. The Bears are actually a horrible team. The Phillies are good. They will own CC.

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