Monday, September 22, 2008

I'm Brian Dawkins and I'm Still a Damn Good Football Player

Brian Dawkins: Hi. My name is Brian Dawkins, and I'm a football player. In fact, I'm still a damn good football players, in case you've all been too jaded to notice.

Media: Hi, Brian!

BD: I know a lot of y'all been sayin' this and that about me being too old and too slow and done. Well, I'm here to tell y'all I told you I can still play, and I'll be damned if I didn't show y'all yesterday. (from the Daily News):

"I don't know what a 34-year-old is supposed to feel like or play like. I just know I had to get to Ben; he was scrambling, and I had to make the play . . . As I got off the [initial] block the back tried to block me. I pushed him back, saw Ben trying to step up, I knew I had to get to him, and I felt somebody at my feet. The next thing I knew, I was in the air. I knew I knocked [the ball] out. I didn't know where it landed . . . basically, it was right up under me. I just had to cradle it in."

In other words, suck on that, bitches! I'm Brian Dawkins. 34. 35. Don't mean shit! I can still play this game! I jacked that little punk-ass Mewelde Moore up, and stripped Ben Roethlisberger like he was a white girl in Colorado and I was Kobe. And I still got it so good I even fell right on that ball. You see that? That's some Wolverine determination. Don't tell me I can't play ball.

Ashely Fox: Are you sure, Brian? After all, players are the last to know when they're done. I should know. Because I'm a woman who's never played the game before in my life and have no idea what it's like.

BD: Listen lady, let the big boys talk about football. I'm sure there's a hungry husband at home that sure could use a warm meal.

And am I sure I can still play? Did you see that play I made? That was some Superman shit right there! I'd like to see y'all try that!

In summation, you can all suke my duke. I'm Brian Dawkins, bitches. I'm not done until I say I'm done!

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