Monday, September 29, 2008

The Flyers Bid Adieu to the Spectrum

Some great videos from Puck Daddy on the Flyers farewell to the Spectrum on Saturday.

So long, Spectrum.

I Like the Phillies and Hate the Mets

And since I'm still furious about the Eagles completely crapping the bed last night, I decided to put up some great clips and images from around the Web from this weekend in baseball, specifically the Phillies clinching and the Mets choking.

Phillies playoff schedule is set.

Brett Myers talks about stuff.

Funny picture.

Another funny picture.

Myers and Feliz give a lady a shower.

Charlie talks, I can barely understand him.

Kyle Kendrick is not on the postseason roster.

Harry K's call.


Florida hates the Mets, too!

The Greatest Minute of the Weekend

Now, Saturday was by far a tremendous day. Absolutely Incredible if you will. Between the Phillies winning the National League East, or as Tim McCarver put it, the National League Division of the East, and Penn State beating up on Illinois, it was a great day. Aside from all that, there was one minute that made Saturday that much better. Now, we have told you about the three idiots in front of us at the Penn State games, who have been dubbed Brokeback by Rev. Paul's cousin.

Well, with an 8 o'clock game, I figured they would be worse than before with a national tv game and a chance for them to try to get on television, which is all they seem to care about. Around game time two of them, short stubby-fingered fat guy and child-molesting looking mustached guy, come walking up in full painting suits to protect them from the weather. Not only did they have these horrible-looking one-piece suit things on and their trademark, pathetic cowboy hats, they decided to spray paint "Penn State Football Rocks" on the back of their outfits. Totally cool idea. I was instantly tempted to stab them in the faces. Although on a positive note, their younger flaming friend was nowhere to be found. So right away, they were down a pathetic man. After one PSU td, and a chance for them to "press" a young kid in the air to try and get on tv, the best moment of Saturday happened.

The young Flaming member of Brokeback came walking towards the seats obviously drunk and he seemed a bit cranky. He walked up to their aisle and starts yelling at old weird Mustache guy, "YOU!!!, Yeah You! Down there, now! Come down there now! YOU!"

At that point, the other two looked at each other and and did not respond to their angry, homosexual friend. Which prompted they angry gay man to yell some more, "YOU!, YEAH YOU! You want to do this in front of all these people, right now, or down there!?! I'll do it right here!" At that point a man in the aisle made a comment towards the guy, which he responded with, "You shut the Fuck UP!" He may have snapped his finger in a Z pattern as well, I am not positive. At that point creepy Mustache got up and left with the distraught not so Gay, and by gay i mean happy, man and never returned again. They were gone the rest of the game, leaving stubby-fingered fat guy by himself with no friends around. It was a glorious minute sequence that gave us glorious hours of laughter afterwards and shed some light on Brokeback.

These are proven facts about the three douchebags. They are in fact douchebags. Two of them are homosexuals, not that there is anything wrong with that at all but it gives you a better idea about who they are.

The two homosexuals are in fact gay lovers with a very rocky relationship. The other member of their group should consider suicide. The other two should also consider suicide. It is not all right to stand up every time a team scores and point in the direction of a first down and to try and get on tv. They believe getting on tv is more important than the game itself. They enjoy the wave. The wave is stupid. Anyone who does the wave, especially while the home team is on offense, should be kicked out of the stadium [Ed Note: Espeicially in a fucking 7-point game, in the second half, when Illinois just scored and your team has the ball, you stupid fucking students!]. They ruin the game for fans that come to support their team and are diehard fans. I hate these people very much.

Side note: At one point fatty tried high-fiving me after a missed field goal and I refused to even look towards him, snubbing him and leaving him holding his hand in the air like an idiot. I wish the same could have been said about Rev Paul a few weeks ago.

Also, Penn State's nickel defense is very annoying. Evan Royster will be the career rushing leader before his career is over. That was horrible play calling by the Eagles last night. The defense did a good enough job to win the game. Donovan did not run the ball once. The Bears are actually a horrible team. The Phillies are good. They will own CC.

Yesterday Sucked, but Saturday was Great

OK, let's just try to forget about last night's shitshow for a second and go back to the earlier portion of the weekend. You know, the part that didn't suck.

In fact, Friday and Saturday were pretty awesome all around. With everyone's favorite(?) midseason acquisition on the mound, the Phils jumped out to a 3-0 lead thanks to Ryan Howard's decision to take the MVP from all comers in September.

With a 3-0 lead, the Phils tried to give it away with all sorts of errors, but Joe Blanton pitched the game of life, well Phillies life anyway, going 6 innings, giving up just one earned run on 5 hits. The Phillies got themselves some breathing room thanks to a bases-loaded, bases-clearing double by Chase followed by a double by Howard, the bullpen did its job, and the Mets lost, making the magic number 1 heading into Saturday.

I have to tell you all, Saturday was a hell of a day for me. Arkansas Fred and I left for Penn State to attend the game against Illinois at 8 with the intentions of getting there early, staking a good spot to watch the Phils game at 3:55 and then heading over to Beaver Stadium. So we left town at 7 in the morning and headed to State College.

We're on our way up 476, off toward 80, when we get through the Lehigh Tunnel and Arkansas Fred, driving at the time, turns to me and asks, "You got the tickets, right?" Now, when Arkansas Fred asks this, it's usually just a formality. He expects some snide remark from me because I have never, ever, in my entire life, forgotten my tickets to any sporting event, and I've been going to sporting events my whole life. Until Saturday. When I heard the question, I stopped a second, thought, and said, "Oh man, I don't. I really don't have them. I left them in my school bag and I left my school bag in my room." Back in Philadelphia. Arkansas Fred thought I was joking. I was not. For the first time in my life, I forgot my tickets. I'm a jackass. Arkansas Fred was pissed. We turned around, headed back to Philly and made a 3-hour trip into a much, much longer one.

But still, we got to State College at 12:30 for an 8 o'clock game, so shit, we still plenty of freakin time. Fred and I walked around campus for a few hours, checked out the sites and sounds (women) of our former stomping grounds and settled in to Rotelli on Calder, where it just so happens Arkansas Fred's former roommate works. Now, there is one disclaimer here: Rotelli is owned by a Pittsburgh fan, albeit it a pretty awesome one who actually likes Philadelphia, so we had to ask to get the Phils game on. Naturally we did, and they obliged, so we were set with spots at the bar, right in front of the TV. It was glorious.

After a few 22 ounce Yuenglings, I was ready to go.

Once the game started, I was transfixed on the television and the beer. Meanwhile, on the other televisions around us, Florida was losing to Ole Miss, Wisconsin was losing to Michigan and Alabama was routing Georgia. And all that was great, but I only had eyes for Fox and the Phils game. Jamie Moyer was dealing, but John Lannan was keeping pace. Until the 4th. Chase and Howard led things off with back-to-back singles and both scored on sac flies. 2-0 Phils. Nice.

In a bar full of people only interested in college football, Arkansas Fred and I were going completely nuts over the Phils. At that moment, with the rally towels waving and the fans going wild, we wished were were there. Not in State College. But still, it was pretty awesome watching. But it wasn't all joyous. Those pesky Nats eked one out the next inning to keep things close. Until Jay Werth continued his ascension into a real everyday player, homering to right to make it a two-run lead once more.

Moyer, just as expected, was masterful again, exiting after 6 with just a run charged to him. After Durbin did his thing, it was on to Ryan Madson in the 8th who had suddenly become a pretty dominant setup guy in recent weeks. But his string of good fortune took a hit, as Madson surrendered a run to make it a 3-2 game. Still, he got out of it with the lead, so the game was in the hands of Mr. Perfect.

Thankfully, Pete Happy hit an RBI in the bottom of the 8th to drive in Shane and give the Phils a 4-2 lead. Certainly, I was ever-confident the division was ours. And then Lidge, he of the 40-for-40 in save opportunities, made things a bit interesting.

After starting things off with a strikeout, Lidge gave up a single, walk and single, making it a 4-3 game just like that. Then, Arkansas Fred said, "You're going to be perfect all year and blow it now!" I turned to him and told him to shut his fucking mouth and never speak again. Sure, it didn't look good, but I had faith. For a second. Then Cristian Guzman singled to load the bases with one out. Shit! Now I was nervous, pissed and ready to explode, one way or other. Then this happened:

HOLY SHIT! WHAT A FREAKIN PLAY! WHAT A PLAY! I KNOW I HATE YOU, JIMMY, BUT MAN DO I LOVE YOU TOO! GREAT STOP! HUGE! WHAT A TURN! FUCK, YEAH! And I started pounding the bar with my hand, yelling in excitement. I was a happy, happy man.

From there, Arkansas Fred and I walked up to Beaver Stadium, settled down in our seats and got set for a tough football game. And let me tell you, it was a tough game. Illinois was no joke. Juice Williams and Arrelious Benn, along with the spread offense, gave Penn State all it could handle. After a stalled drive to open the game, Illinois marched right down the field and took a 7-0 lead. But Daryll Clark led Penn State right back to tie the game with a 1-yard TD run of his own.

However, the Illini answered, as Juice hooked up with Benn for a 33-yard score. Then Derrick William scored for Penn State on a 21-yard touchdown catch, and it looked like whoever had the ball last would win the game. Penn State's offense continued to move the ball at will, but Illinois' spread was giving Penn State fits. And there are many reasons why.

First off, Penn State's nickel defense is just plain stupid. Instead of bringing in a third cornerback, Tom Bradley sends in another safety and puts Mark Rubin on a wide receiver. Rubin is slow. And he's white. And he's a safety. He cannot cover wide receivers, especially one as good as as Arrelious Benn, evident by the 54-yard touchdown he gave up to Benn. Second, Tony Davis is the one starting corner and he is very solid. On the other side, A.J. Wallace and Lydell Sargeant split time and are both pretty good. Sargeant has started the majority of games this year and A.J. was getting the bulk of the playing time Saturday. So when you go to nickel, why not bring Sargeant instead of another safety and actually have another guy who can cover? You know why? Because as good as the guy is, and he is damn good, sometimes Tom Bradley is really dumb. There's really no other explanation for it.

But hey, the Lions did manage to pull it out, 38-24, because of three people over everyone else: Derrick Williams, Evan Royster and Navorro Bowman. D-Will, now in his senior season, was the prize recruit not only for Penn State, but the country when he came in in 2005. He started off just as you'd expect, taking college football storm, before a broken arm derailed his freshman campaign. Then in 2006, he underachieved, and last year, D-Will got off to a slow start. But he gained momentum down the stretch, and the man has carried it over into his final season in Happy Valley.

And Saturday, D-Will did something no player had ever done in Joe Paterno's 2,000-year run as head coach. Derrick Williams became the first Nittany Lion under Paterno to rush for a touchdown, catch a touchdown and return a kick for a touchdown. And his 94-yard return in the 4th quarter was HUGE. I lost my damn mind when he took that to the house.

Evan Royster has simply been Mr. Unstoppable this season.

For the game, Royster had 139 yards on just 14 carries, as his offensive line continued to open the holes and Royster continued to take advantage. In 5 games this season, Royster has racked up 524 yards on just 66 carries, averaging nearly 8 yards a pop, and he has 7 touchdowns. The man has been a beast.

And now on to my man, Navorro Bowman.

The redshirt sophomore has been without question the best player on the Nittany Lion defense this year. He's the most athletic linebacker on the team, and he should play every snap of every game on defense. He is a stud. Saturday was just another example of that. He had a team-high 10 tackles, including a huge hit in the fourth quarter on Daniel Dufrene that forced a fumble that Penn State recovered. The man is a beast. Through 5 games, he leads the team with 45 tackles and 25 solo tackles.

Meanwhile, Tyrell Sales stinks. He's too slow to play this game. And Josh Hull is no better. If I had my way, Bani Gbadyu, another athletic linebacker, would start with Bowman, and Penn State would play with three corners most of the time, playing Hull and Sales sparingly, especially against spread offenses. And on running downs, they could play their version of the nickel with Rubin moving up closer to the line of scrimmage and bringing in another safety. But alas, I'm no coach, and I don't take seniority into account. All I care about is putting the best players on the field. I wish Penn State did the same from the get-go, but JoePa loves him some seniors. Even if they suck horribly like Anthony Morelli last season.

Anyway, it's hard to gripe about the game as a whole. Penn State won. The offense looked great again, even without Jordan Norwood playing due to injury. Daryll Clark has proven again that Penn State made the right choice quarterback, and now the Nittany Lions are the highest-ranked team in the Big 10, now No. 6 in both polls. Also, the douchebag fellas in our section had a little squabble, but Arkansas Fred will get you more on that.

All around it was a great Saturday. And in case you haven't heard, the Mets lost yesterday while the Brewers won, which means, if I'm doing my math correctly, the Mets choked away a playoff berth yet again. The Phils take on the Brewers at 3 on Wednesday.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Dear Andy ...

Dear Andy Reid,

Hey there, buddy. How you doing? Common sense here. I know it's been a while since we've last met (1997), but I saw what happened to you last night and felt obligated to send you a little note.

You see, when you have the ball on the half-yard line and you're down 4 points, you really should try to use me. That's what I'm here for. It's no bother. Really. I swear. So next time you are less than a yard away, with the game on the line, maybe you should try to RUN A GOD DAMNED QUARTERBACK SNEAK WITH YOUR 240 POUND QUARTERBACK YOU STUPID FUCKING ASSHOLE!!!!! ESPECIALLY WHEN NO ONE WAS LINED UP OVER THE GOD DAMN CENTER YOU FAT PIECE OF FUCKING SHIT!!!!

Honestly, what do you have against me, Andy? We used to be friends. I know it was a long, long time ago, but I gotta tell you, I'm always here for you. And if you're too timid to reconnect, just ask one of the millions of Eagles fans you torture week in and week out what the hell you're supposed to do on 4th and 1 at the fucking half-yard line. I bet you they'll all use me and say, "QB sneak."


Common Sense

P.S. Fuck off Eagles. Every single one of you tried to sabotage that game. The defense made Kyle Orton look like Joe Montana in the first half. DeSean started off gangbusters and then fumbled, dropped a pass, and looked like an asshole. Donny threw a terrible pick, fell on a play near the goal line and should have audibled on that final offensive play when he saw no one over Jamal Jackson. Jason Avant, catch a freakin slant that would have been a touchdown next time jerk. Same thing for you, Hank, on that out in the end zone. And David fucking Akers, go get fucked. You're the most overrated kicker in football. You haven't been good in three years. Go to hell. I hate you all. You aren't shit without Westbrook.

Friday, September 26, 2008

Meet the Best Point Guard in the Class of 2009

John Wall, widely considered the No. 1 ranked high school player in the nation, was featured in a nice story by Jason Jordan.

Jordan discusses how Wall acted out after losing his dad to cancer at the age of 8 and how he turned things around to not only become the best player in the country, but also a humble kid on the path to stardom. Check it out. Oh yeah, the kid is nasty.

Turns Out Seahawks Fans are Horrible People

At least one is anyway. Even I find this to be offensive, and I don't really find many things offensive. Although, it was creative I guess.

Go to Deadspin for more, because I'm not touching that one here. But I would like to say I hate the Giants.

A Cool Sports Fight

Now, I'm not sure if this is Australian rules football or rugby—in fact, I'm not even sure what the difference is between the two—but this is an awesome fight that puts the Victorino-Tavarez "fight" to shame. From Deuce of Davenport:

Baseball players, take note: That's how a fight is supposed to look.

It's Friday, Time to Dance

In an effort to inspire the Phillies to win the NL East for the 2nd straight year, I offer up the rallying cry of the last Phillies team to make it to the World Series. So without further ado, I present the 1993 Phillies' adopted tune "Whoomp! (There It Is)" by Tag Team.

It's Friday, time to dance. LET'S GO PHILLIES!!!!

A letter to the Marlins

Dear Florida Marlins,
Guys, I know you have nothing to play for, but for the love of God, just win. I hate the Mets. You hate the Mets. Go out there and kick the shit out of them. You guys are young, talented, and have six months off after Sunday. All I'm asking is that you go out there and give the Mets hell. Also, please throw a fastball at Jose Reyes' face. If you want to throw at David Wright's wrist and break it, you can do that.

Thank you,
Every Phillies fan alive.

For a team facing one of the worst teams in baseball with a one game lead and three games left, I do not feel very good right now. I try not to be a pessimist(Ed note: Really?), but dang it, I'm nervous. Maybe it's because the Phillies have made the postseason so few times in my lifetime so I'm not used to the Phillies playing important games, but I'm downright nervous right now. With their offense, there should be no question that they could win, but who knows what starting pitching staff will show up? I don't want the wild card either for the Phillies. I want the NL EAST and I want to tell every New York Mets fan in this area to shut the fuck up again you dumb, arrogant motherfuckers. This is it Phillies. Don't get scared now. You have your entire season in your hands. Just fucking beat the Nationals and you are the NL EAST champions again. If they make the playoffs, they will face either the Dodgers or Brewers. Two teams you just swept. Things could not look any better for you. Yet somehow I'm still nervous.

Also, in University Park, Penn State has a chance to show the entire country that their offense is the real deal. A night game in Beaver Stadium, with an entire stadium white out, they face the Fighting Illini. (I think White outs should be meant for student sections only. If you are alumni and want to act like a student, try standing on your feet the whole game and screaming your lungs out while the Nittany Lions are on defense.) A huge win over Illinois will put fear into the hearts of the entire Big 10. This is a top 25 ranked team and a team that beat them last year.(That was Anthony Morelli's fault by the way. The guy decided to throw 4 INTs in the last 18 minutes of that game.) The stadium should be electric and with Mo Evans back, the d-line should get much needed help.

Also, Juice Williams does not scare anyone. I've seen Juice Williams play before and let's just say I'm not impressed. Complete a few more passes and we'll talk. This should be a 28 point win. Anything less and I'm punching someone on College Ave after the game.

Phillies Links

This weekend is huge. I know it, you know and surely, the Phillies know it. At least I hope, because it sure didn't look like Brett Myers got the memo on Wednesday. The Phils do control their own destiny, but wins last night by both the Mets and Brewers mean the Phils have only a one-game lead in the division and the wild card. There's not much room for error, so they must, MUST win tonight. Ånd they have this guy taking the mound:

Sweet Christ! Don't fuck this up, Joe Blanton. We need you, in all your rotund glory, to pitch the game of your life tonight. And you better make damn sure you do. It's the fucking Nationals here. Like, the worst team in the entire sport that is set up for epic fail.

It's going to be a nerve-wracking weekend, and Bill Conlin had an awesome article discussing just that. My favorite lines in a article full of great lines:

The pre-meetings rotation would have staff ace Cole Hamels starting a meaningful game Sunday. (Sorry, Jamie, we know who really is the staff ace this year but have to follow protocol.) But should the Phillies clinch the division tonight or tomorrow, he could throw a side instead and be ready to open the Division Series on Wednesday. However, if Myers has used up his quota of trust tokens, Manuel could use the 2 days off to flip him with Moyer.

Well said, Bill. Well said.

Photo courtesy of Deadspin.

Ryan Howard is no longer the strikeout king. Via The Fightins:

The undesirable distinction of single-season strikeout leader now belongs to Mark Reynolds of the Arizona Diamondbacks, who earlier today became the first MLB player to ever surpass 200 K’s in one season. Last year, Ryan Howard broke the record previously held by Mark’s teammate, Adam Dunn, when he whiffed 199 times.

200 strikeouts. Yikes. Howard can and will still probably get there, but I never thought anyone else would do it.

Fredi Gonzalez wants to beat the Mets very badly, and I respect him for it. Via Walkoff Walk:

"We're going to jump from the frying pan right into the fire and be in a significant series - 'spoiler' or whatever you want to call it," Gonzalez said Wednesday before the Marlins played the Washington Nationals.

In explaining why he was putting some young Marlins prospects in the lineup Wednesday against Washington, Gonzalez noted that, "If everything stays the same, we're getting ready to go play a real significant series in New York."

Yes sir. A repeat of 2007 would be great.

So Penn State Should Be No. 1 Right?

If my deduction skills are correct, Penn State is the best team in the country. Hear me out. USC was No. 1 in the nation heading into last night's game at Oregon State. Oregon State beat USC 27-21. Penn State plowed the Beavers (see what I did there?) 45-14, and truthfully, it wasn't even that close. So naturally, Penn State should be No. 1 in the country, at least if they take care of business at home against Illinois tomorrow, right?

Obviously, I know that's not how college football works. The Nittany Lions, no matter what they do on Saturday, have no shot at vaulting 11 spots to No. 1. But we may have learned an awful lot about the 12th ranked Lions in USC's loss at Oregon State. The once invincible Trojans have, for the second straight year, lost to a losing team (at the time) on the road in the Pac-10. It's becoming a habit for Pete Carroll's boys.

But make no mistake about it, Oregon State flat-out beat USC. The Beavers didn't have this game handed to them. They took it. Offensively, Jacquizz Rodgers gashed the vaunted USC defense all by himself, gaining 186 yards and scoring twice. He did gain 99 against Penn State, but most of it was in the second half against backups. And as a team, Oregon State rushed for just 92 yards at Beaver Stadium compared to 176 against USC.

But on offense is where the real difference in statistics lies. Last night, the Trojans managed just 86 yards rushing and fell behind 21-0. Penn State steamrolled the Beavers on the ground, to the tune of 239 yards, and jumped out to a 28-0 advantage. For the game, USC finished with 313 yards of total offense while Penn State wracked up 454. And the scoring differential—21 for USC, 45 for Penn State—shows just how legit the Nittany Lion offense is.

Now I know that playing on the road vs. playing at home in college football are two very different things. Much more so than in the NFL, college teams truly do get a home field advantage. Student sections go berserk, and college players truly feed off that energy. Penn State had a very distinct advantage playing Oregon State at home, with the Beavers having to travel all the way across the country and play in the biggest (this year) and one of the noisiest stadiums in the nation. Meanwhile, USC had to play a Pac-10 rival and deal with the Oregon State fans, who were surely on top of their game against the No. 1 team in the land.

But still, this has to bode well for Penn State. USC was hands down considered the best team in the country before last night. They embarrassed Ohio State on national television and looked like a well-oiled machine. And if any comparisons can be made, it looks like this Penn State team is for real. With the way USC manhandled the Buckeyes and stumbled against Oregon State, it truly gives hope that Penn State could actually toppled Ohio State and win the Big 10, although they do have to play in Columbus, a place where the Lions haven't had much success. Plus, they have to take on a very good Wisconsin team in Madison, and as we've seen in the past, anything can happen in league play.

Well, the journey begins on Saturday night when the Nittany Lions take on No. 22 Illinois at home. It certainly won't be an easy game, unlike Penn State's first four contests, but it is a game they should win. And reinforcements are on the way. Suspended starting defensive linemen, tackle Abe Koroma and All-American end Maurice Evans, are going to play:

"Both will play. I've kept them out of three games and the Judicial Affairs people have indicated that there's nothing that they're going to do that says they can't play, so they probably will play," Paterno said during his call-in radio show Thursday night.

That's certainly good news for Penn State, because the Lions will need all the help they can get in Big 10 play. And by the looks of things, they may just be a team to be reckoned with in the Big 10 and beyond.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Plaxico and Brett Have Something in Common

As I'm sure you're all aware of, Giants wide receiver Plaxico Burress was suspended for two weeks (one game, the Giants have a bye Sunday), by the team for skipping out on the team without telling why he was absent or returning any calls.

Well, Deadspin dug up this tidbit:

Totowa police responded to two domestic disturbance calls at Giants receiver Plaxico Burress’s home the past few months, borough police Chief Robert Coyle confirmed today.

In both instances, Burress’s wife, Tiffany, had phoned the police, reports show. Temporary restraining orders were obtained in each but were later dismissed in state court.

Bitch, you betta check yo-self. Plaxico will slap a ho!

Sounds like Plax and Brett Myers would get along swimmingly.

And you know what, just because, here's that sick catch by Morgan State wide receiver Edwin Baptiste.

Yeah, that's a catch worthy of a slap on the back. Pun intended.

Somehow, Isiah Thomas is Behind This

For the 1 millionth time, oft-injured Allan Houston decided to make a run at a comeback this season, but in a twist of fate, a team finally signed him. More specifically, the New York Knicks resigned the 37-year-old Houston to the veteran's minimum. The same Allan Houston with chronic knee problems who hasn't played since 2004-05, when he played just 20 games.

Somehow, Isiah Thomas has to be behind this. I just know it.

I guess the Knicks believe Allan Houston, despite his penchant for getting injured, ain't no bitch.

Patron Saint Doug Glanville Gets Praise

As you all know, this site is named after the one and only Doug Glanville. The reasons are personal, but not too personal to share.

While it's true that Glanville had a pop-gun arm, loved to pop up and lacked any sort of power, he was a great guy, very good at tracking down balls in centerfield and had his bright spots. In 1999, Dougy Fresh had a career year with the Phils, batting .325 with 204 hits, 38 doubles, 73 RBIs, 34 steals and .457 slugging percentage, all career highs. He also scored 101 runs, the second most of his career (106 in '98) and had 11 home runs, also good for his second best total (14 in 2001).

Even though the Phils traded fan favorite Mickey Morandini for Glanville, he became a well-liked guy. And when the Phillies announced they were building a new stadium, naturally I dubbed it as The House that Glanville Built as a running jokes with my friends. After all, Glanville was the anti-Ruth when it came to baseball. The Babe was big, fat, powerful and a awe-droppingly talented. He was bigger than baseball and larger than life. Glanville was small in stature, skinny, fast and a guy who could go unnoticed just about anywhere.

So when I decided to start this site, the name was a perfect fit. And now, Glanville's name has emerged yet again, thanks to Rob Neyer of ESPN, via Deadspin:

Unless Jones remains in baseball somehow, I'm not sure how interesting his column will be. Jones always has written from the perspective of the white, American-born, veteran player, and I've always gotten the impression that he's sort of the archetype: spends his offseasons hunting and fishing, loves the American flag, doesn't really want to know whether he has any gay teammates. Probably a good guy to have a beer with. I know guys like that, and I like them.

That doesn't make Todd Jones a great writer, though. Frankly, I learn more from one Doug Glanville column than from all the Todd Jones columns I've read.

And you know what? Neyer is right. Glanville, a graduate of Philadelphia's own prestigious University of Pennsylvania, has written very insightful things (here, here and a bunch here). Doug is clearly an intelligent guy, and it's good to see fellow writers give him props for his chosen profession in life after baseball. Keep on keepin on Mr. Glanville.

Just Like Me, the Braves Get Ecstatic When the Mets Lose

Here's a little nugget passed along by Rob Iracane at Walkoff Walk. Apparently, New York Post blogger Brian Costello was in Philadelphia covering the Phillies-Braves to keep Mets fans abreast of what was going on with the team their Mets are chasing.

After the game, he went to interview Chipper Jones and found the Braves gathered around the TV, watching the end of the Mets-Cubs game:

As Derrek Lee singled in the go-ahead run the Braves exploded, cheering on the Cubs. It happened again when Aramis Ramirez homered and a few members of the team and traveling party began singing "Meet the Mets." Others mocked the Kevin James video shown at Shea Stadium where he screams "Let's Go Mets."

Well shit, Atlanta. If you're so pumped to see the Mets lose, you really should have laid down for us the past two nights. You do know that both the Mets and Phillies can't miss the playoffs right? And from the sound of it, you hate the Mets as much as us. Couldn't you have helped us bury them?

Still, even though I despise the Braves, it's pretty cool to see other teams rejoice in the Mets folding.

An Actual Bomb Would Have Saved Me the Trouble

So I'm sitting in my office, getting ready for the Phils game, when I get this text message from a friend who works in the Spectrum at 4:48 p.m.:

Bomb scare at citizens bank?

Naturally, I think he's pulling my leg. You see, my friend has a habit of trying to get people to believe ridiculous things. But just to be sure, I started scanning the Internet., nothing. Comcast, nothing. But finally, I ventured over to CBS 3 and lo and behold: there were suspicious packages found near Pattison and Darian, fans were evacuated from Citizens Bank Park (but not players) and the Philadelphia bomb squad was summoned—for what turned out to be freakin hot dogs.

What a freakin joke. Way to get on top of that one Philadelphia. I must say, however, that is pretty hilarious. And CBS 3 did a great job covering it and getting updates., on the other hand, didn't have a single mention of the incident when I left my office at 6:15 p.m. That's seems pretty awful if you ask me.

Anyway, I wish there actually was a God damn bomb at the ballpark last night, because it would have saved me the trouble of witnessing one of the worst baseball games in my life. From the moment I entered the stadium, things just weren't right. I headed over to get a Schmidter, and right as I turned the corner to get in line, three Braves fans entered in front of me. And they were all women. Fat women. And they knew nothing about baseball. And took forever to decide if all of them wanted food or not. Shockingly, all three huge beasts got a sandwich.

After that wonderful experience, I started to head to my seat—Section 233, Row 7, Seat 8. In all the games I've been to, and there's been many, I've never sat in 233. I wasn't quite sure where it was, and I was quite baffled when I tried to get there. When you enter from the third base gate, you immediately see section 133, so I assumed 233 would be right above it. Good assumption right? Wrong. In fact, the steps right near the third base gate say you can get to 212-232, not 233. What the hell?

Apparently you have to go up the escalators or ramp near the Schmidter stand to get to 233. No one told me this, so I said, "Fuck it," and went up to the Hall of Fame Club, walked through and finally found 233. And let me tell you something about section 233, it sucks. There is only one concession, and it only sells Miller Lite.

I hate Miller Lite. It's easily my least favorite beer on the planet. Yet other people really seem to enjoy it. Especially chicks. I just don't get it. It's horrible. Just like section 233, where you can't see the left field corner or the giant scoreboard screen. The view to home is nice, but as a whole, the section is terrible. I hope to never sit in section 233 again in my life.

And as if sitting in a horrible section and drinking Miller Lite wasn't bad enough, Brett Myers decided he wants to be a closer again and sabotaged the Phils right from the start. He gave up two runs in the first inning, and the Braves were smacking Brett around like he smacks his wife.

Still, after Brett gave up another in the 3rd to make it a 3-1 game, the Phils battled back to make it 3-2, and Ryan Howard tied the game in the 4th with his 47th homer of the season. Then Brett gave it right back. Immediately. To the tune of 3 runs. After a fly out, Myers walked Martin Prado. Then McCann doubled home Prado. Then he intentionally walked Casey Kotchman.

Finally, about 2 innings too late, Charlie came out and got his opening day starter, but Chad Durbin didn't fair much better, although it wasn't his fault. The latest MVP favorite showed why he might not deserve it: he sucks at fielding. Like, worse than a little leaguer. Howard made a horrific throw on a grounder, hitting Kotchman in the back with his throw, allowing McCann to score. Then Durbin got Jeff Francoeur on strikes and the inning should have been over. But it wasn't. Thanks to Howard.

Some guy named Brandon Jones then singled in Kotchman, Eyre came in to face Chipper Jones, and Chipper crushed a 3-run homer. Just like that a 3-3 game became 9-3. Nice.

The line for Myers last night: 4 and a third innings pitched, 10 hits, 6 runs, 4 earned, 2 walks, 3 strikeouts—and it should have been worse. The Braves were absolutely smoking Brett all night long, even when they got out. Last night's terrible outing was actually an improvement for Myers over his last start, where he went 4 innings, gave up 9 hits and ten earned runs and walked 2 in Florida. In case you're keeping score, that's a total of 8 and a third innings pitched, 19 hits, 16 runs and 14 earned runs in his last two starts. Looks like someone is itching to be an IronPig again.

The thing is, this just makes no sense at all. What the hell is wrong with this guy? He was absolutely dreadful to start the season, but since his stint in the minors he's been lights out. Hell, in his start before his meltdown in Miami, Brett pitched a complete game two-hitter. And then 16 runs in 8 innings to follow up? What?!? This guy is just the ultimate headcase. And I hate him. That was two of the worst pitching performances I've ever seen, and they came when the division is on the line. Pathetic.

It was a horrible game. The only good part (besides tying it up briefly) occurred in the 8th inning. With Victorino on 3rd and the Phils down 6 runs, Julian Tavarez pulled this bush-league maneuver, and Shane didn't respond so kindly.

Victorino vs. Tavarez from on Vimeo.

Thank The Fightins for the video. That was pretty cool. I'm guessing Shane had some unflattering words about Tavarez's mother or maybe called him the son of a terrorist whore.

The truth of the matter is there should have been a fight in this game. Now, I know it would be foolish for the Phils to have anyone get involved that is a big part of the team and might be suspended, but with a 6-run lead in the 8th inning, Josh Anderson stole 2nd. That's a no-no my friends. And if I had my way, I would have put in someone like Adam Eaton and had him beam everyone until he got thrown out, especially in the ninth after the whole Tavarez shenanigans. But no. Apparently the unwritten rules don't matter to the Phillies or Braves, even in a game that was a blowout.

Luckily, the Cubs pulled it out against the Mets, so the Phils still lead by 1.5, and that lead will be either 1 or 2 at the end of the day with the Phillies idle and the Mets finishing things up with the Cubs (weather-permitting). All in all, it was a pathetic series. After attending a great game in the series opener, the last two nights I wish I hadn't wasted my time or money. But that's pretty much all we can do with this team. Waste our time, money and energy to support them, only to be disappointed one way or the other. Please, please just sweep the Nationals. That's all I ask.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

You Got Dunked On

I gotta tell ya, I'm ashamed of myself for not coming across this site before today, but I want to personally thank BallHype for turning me on to You Got Dunked On.

This an awesome idea for a blog. I could watch basketball players dunk on one another all day, every day. Now I can. Here's a taste of what's in store.

The site is great. Dunks are sweet. Enjoy.

Matt Millen Fired

Fellow Penn State alum Matt Millen, after inexplicably keeping his job for seven years, has finally been fired as Lions GM and president.

This is only about, say, six and half years too late. In Millen's reign, the Lions were a paltry 31-84, the worst record in the NFL in that span, and he's picked bust after bust in the draft.

Still, as a former All-American at Penn State and four-time Super Bowl winner, I've grown to like Millen. He was a pretty good broadcaster before destroying the Lions and crushing the souls of every Detroit inhabitant. And back when I was in college, Millen came to Penn State to speak with sports journalism students. This was right after Millen was fined for failing to interview any minority candidates before hiring Steve Mariucci. He was very candid, honest and eloquent as a speaker, believe it or not. He talked about how right when the head coaching position opened up, the Lions wanted Mariucci. He thought it would be disrespectful to parade in candidates that the Lions had no intention of hiring because Mariucci was their guy. Whether you agree with that sentiment or not, he made a pretty good case for his argument.

I thoroughly enjoyed meeting Millen back then and listening to his perspective. But man, that guy should have been axed a long, long time ago. He and Billy King should teach a class on how to keep your job for a long time despite absolutely sucking at it. I know I'd take that class, and there aren't two more qualified people in the world to teach it.

Donny Talks to The700Level

Very cool interview over at The700Level with Donovan McNabb. Enrico asked some excellent questions, and No. 5 answered them all succinctly and seemingly earnestly. Here's a brief audio clip.

Go check it out.

Cole's No Ace Just Yet

On the surface, Cole Hamels' performance last night doesn't look all that bad: 7 innings pitched, 3 runs, only 2 of which were earned and 7 seven strikeouts. But if you watched the game or were at the game like I was, it was pretty clear that Cole did not look right, and he certainly did not look like an ace.

Right from the get-go, he gave up a run to the lowly Atlanta Braves and put his team in a hole. Then, after the Phils tied it up in the 2nd, Cole gave the lead right back to the Braves the very next inning. And he did it in horrible fashion. With runners on 1st and 2nd, Cole caught Kelly Johnson heading for third and had him easily picked off. Only he didn't, because Cole, a pitcher who is supposed to have pinpoint accuracy, threw the ball into leftfield, allowing Johnson to score. Just as quickly as they tied it up, the Phils found themselves down again thanks to a blunder by their prized lefty.

And just to make things a little tougher on the Phils, Hamels gave up a home run to Casey Kotchman in the 6th, a player who had just 4 home runs off lefties all year and was batting a subpar .241 against southpaws since joining the Braves.

Now, I'm not saying this loss was entirely Cole's fault. Hardly. The Phils managed to score just two runs and notch six hits off Mike Hampton, who was good about a half decade or so ago, and they didn't get a single hit against the Braves bullpen in three innings. So it wasn't all on Cole, but it certainly wasn't a performance worthy of an ace. Maybe that's because Cole just isn't there yet, but this team sure would like to see him be one right about now.

Meanwhile, over in Metland, Johan Santana once again showed Cole what an ace looks like. Now, he also dug the Mets into a hole, as the Cubs jumped out to a 2-0 lead after 3, but from there on out, Johan blanked the best team in the National League, striking out 10 Cubbies in the process. The Phils loss, accompanied by the Mets win, cut the Phillies' lead to 1.5 games with just 4 more to play.

Tonight, I embark on my third straight trip to Citizens Bank Park, as Brett Myers takes on Jo-Jo Reyes. Let's hope Brett's last start was an anomaly and not a return to his pre-IronPigs form. Then the Phils wrap up the regular season against the Nationals Friday, Saturday and Sunday with the division up for grabs.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Riley Cote is in Mid-Season Form

It may just be preseason, but Flyers enforcer Riley Cote had no qualms about taking on Devils rookie Pierre-Luc Letourneau-Leblond last night at the Wachovia Center.

It was typical Cote, firing away and taking no regard for his own safety. He certainly landed some nice shots, and the Flyers won 4-1 as Steve Downie scored twice. You gotta love hockey, where there are even fights in the extremely early preseason.

Thank Puck Daddy, who also has a season preview of the Flyers, for the video.

It's Relevant Because I Said So

Seeing as I just traded for Larry Johnson in my fantasy league, and the fact that he is a Penn State grad, was a senior when I was a freshman there and should have won the Heisman, not to mention he's the man, I decided to post this video. Also, it's his rendition of Herm Edwards, he of the Miracle at the Meadowlands, so it's relevant all around. Plus, it was posted at Deadspin.

Hilarious. And oh, what the hell, let's post the Herm Edwards press conference and the Miracle at the Meadowlands.

Greg Golson > Kelly Johnson

With tickets already secured for tonight's and tomorrow's games against the Braves, I was planning on taking in last night's series opener in my living room. Not so. Some time after 4, sitting at my desk waiting for the day to end, my roommate called and asked if I wanted to go to the Phils game. Of course I did. What a silly question.

So, for the second time this season, I'm all set to take in an entire three-game set with the Braves at Citizens Bank. And boy did things get off to a great start last night. To sum things this up, this game was won by two people I have been less than pleased with since the All Star break: Jimmy Rollins and Ray Liotta Pat Burrell.

Now, since his ridiculous remarks about the fans, Jimmy Rollins has completely won folks back over with his recent tear. The man has been the undisputed catalyst at the top of the lineup, and last night was no exception. He started off the game with a double and was driven home when Chase followed with a two-bagger of his own.

Then with the game tied 2-2 after those pesky Braves (just ask the Mets!) fought back, Jimmy Rollins made the play of the night. Heading into the 8th, the score was still 2-2. Sidenote: At the end of the 7th inning, two people in my section got up, said goodbye to the people around them and left. What? That's the most asinine thing I've ever seen. Why would you even go to a baseball game if you're going to leave in the 8th inning of a 2-2 tie? It makes no sense at all. It wasn't even late. In fact, it was 9 o'-freakin-clock! These people should be shot—or in the very least banned from ever attending a live sporting event again in their lives. What jerks.

Anyway, back to the game. With the score tied 2-2 and Rudy Seanez (I shit you not) in the game, Kelly Johnson led things off with a shot to right-center, getting a double and winding up on third after Victorino bobbled the ball. Ugh. Runner on third with no one out. I see why the Mets had some difficulty with this team. (Ha!)

Things looked grim, but have no fear, Jimmy is here! The next batter, Omar Infante, smoked a line drive that Jimmy snared. One down, runner on third. And then, this happened. HOLY! FACKIN! BALLS! That was the play of the year right there folks. A high chopper with a decent runner on third, and Jimmy snares the high hop, fires a laser that even Donovan McNabb was impressed with, right on target as Ruiz blocked the plate and applied the tag. That play should have been close. It wasn't. Because Jimmy did everything perfectly. It was awesome.

Scott Eyre then came in and got Casey Kotchman to end the inning. Then the Phils decided it was time for October. Pinch-hit machine Greg Dobbs led things off with a single, and the rook Greg Golson came in to run. And lo and behold, Braves reliever Jeff Bennett must have heard the legend of Golson's speed, because the Atlanta righty fired a ball to first in an attempt to keep Golson close, only to see it sail over Kotchman's head. The fleet-footed Golson wound up on third easily.

After a groundout by Jimmy and a walk to Chase, Jasyon Werth stepped to the plate with the rookie on third and Utley on first. Werth, usually reliable at putting the ball where he wants, failed to do so, hitting a grounder to third. Golson, undeterred, took off for home. Martin Prado fired to the plate, but to no avail. Golson used his ungodly speed to sprint home and get under the tag of catcher Clint Sammons, who did a pathetic job at blocking the plate. It was all sorts of sweet. Watch it here.

Oh, but the Phils weren't done there. No sir. After Howard flew out, the struggling Pat Burrell came up to a roar from the crowd. And he delivered. Just like that, Phils were up 6-2, and the game was theirs. It was fan-freakin-tastic.

And then there was the icing on the cake. The Mets, mired in yet another September choke job, were trounced by the Cubs. The big blow? A grand slam by Cubs starting pitcher Jason Marquis. Awesome. I couldn't have even come up with such a scenario myself. And the New York papers are loving it.

Also, I'd like to give a big kudos to J.A. Happ for continuing to pitch well with another good outing last night, and to Pedro Feliz, who made an awesome play at third you can see here.

Great night all around, and I'll be sure to give another update after tonight's game.

Monday, September 22, 2008

10 Reasons Why Lidge is Better than K-Rod

A very nice shoutout for our boy Brad Lidge. Over at, there's a nice little article citing 10 reasons why Brad Lidge is more valuable than Fransico Rodriguez.

My personal favorites:

1. The hard-throwing righty converted a pair of tough saves over the weekend to improve to 40-for-40 in save opportunities this season. While K-Rod has earned an MLB-record 60 saves (and counting), he's also blown seven opportunities.

6. He's excelled in the season-long NL East pressure-cooker. By contrast, the Angels have owned first place since early May -- and Rodriguez has pitched since mid-July with the reassurance of his team's double-digit cushion in the AL West race.

10. Playing in one of baseball's most hitter-friendly parks -- in one of the nation's most demanding sports cities -- Lidge has shown no signs of letdown since signing a 3-year, $37.5 million contract extension in July. If anything, he's been even more clutch as the spotlight has burned brighter.

Check it out. Definitely a nice, quick read.

Salim Stoudamire, Quote Machine

Salim Stoudamire has been one of my favorite basketball players ever since I laid eyes on him at Arizona. His sweet stroke and fearless release left me mesmerized. Even if he did completely choke in the 2005 tournament to cost me my pool. Had Arizona defeated Illinois in the semifinals (which the Wildcats should have considering they were up huge) and lost to champion UNC, I would have won the pool. But they didn't. And Salim sucked in that game. Big time.

But I got over the complete egg he laid and kept my love for him. When he was drafted by Atlanta, I was excited to see what he could do in the NBA. However, he received very few minutes on some young Hawks squads. But now, Salim is off to San Antonio, presumably to replace Brent Barry, who is off to the Rockets, and his first "press conference" (it's fake in case you are dense) has me excited for Salim again. From the Blowtorch via Skeets:

"The first thing I want to say is, I'm open. All the time. I'm open right now, in fact. Even though sometimes it might look like I'm guarded, trust me — I'm open. I don't know how it always happens, but for whatever reason, I'm always open. I wake up in the morning — open. I get up in the middle of the night to pee — open. I'm driving down the block with my Low End Theory tape in — open. So basically, just get me the rock."

So yeah, get Salim the rock. He's open. Unless he's playing Illinois in the NCAA tournament. I'm not bitter. I swear.

I'm Brian Dawkins and I'm Still a Damn Good Football Player

Brian Dawkins: Hi. My name is Brian Dawkins, and I'm a football player. In fact, I'm still a damn good football players, in case you've all been too jaded to notice.

Media: Hi, Brian!

BD: I know a lot of y'all been sayin' this and that about me being too old and too slow and done. Well, I'm here to tell y'all I told you I can still play, and I'll be damned if I didn't show y'all yesterday. (from the Daily News):

"I don't know what a 34-year-old is supposed to feel like or play like. I just know I had to get to Ben; he was scrambling, and I had to make the play . . . As I got off the [initial] block the back tried to block me. I pushed him back, saw Ben trying to step up, I knew I had to get to him, and I felt somebody at my feet. The next thing I knew, I was in the air. I knew I knocked [the ball] out. I didn't know where it landed . . . basically, it was right up under me. I just had to cradle it in."

In other words, suck on that, bitches! I'm Brian Dawkins. 34. 35. Don't mean shit! I can still play this game! I jacked that little punk-ass Mewelde Moore up, and stripped Ben Roethlisberger like he was a white girl in Colorado and I was Kobe. And I still got it so good I even fell right on that ball. You see that? That's some Wolverine determination. Don't tell me I can't play ball.

Ashely Fox: Are you sure, Brian? After all, players are the last to know when they're done. I should know. Because I'm a woman who's never played the game before in my life and have no idea what it's like.

BD: Listen lady, let the big boys talk about football. I'm sure there's a hungry husband at home that sure could use a warm meal.

And am I sure I can still play? Did you see that play I made? That was some Superman shit right there! I'd like to see y'all try that!

In summation, you can all suke my duke. I'm Brian Dawkins, bitches. I'm not done until I say I'm done!

I was fine with Sunday

I can honestly say that I cannot remember an Eagles game that was as satisfying as yesterday's win. I hate Pittsburgh. I really do. Those people, well they are not my kind of people. They are dumb, smell funny, look stupid, have a penchant for saying just idiotic things, and their city is just not very good. So to be in the Linc, and have so many of those d-bags walking around, sitting NEXT to and behind me, and to watch them suffer in person was just great.

I also would like to say, shame on all the Eagles fans who sold and sell their tickets to away team fans. What is wrong with you people? Why buy tickets if you are just going to sell them to assholes? Kill yourselves. I have a cousin who has tickets next to our season tickets. The fucking asshole has not been to a game in two years and sells his tickets to someone different every game. He sold them to 4 Pittsburgh fans for yesterday's game. I don't like my cousin. I don't really consider him family. I hope I never talk to him again. And I'm a hundred percent serious about that.

As for the game itself, I love defense. I love blitzing. I love Brian Dawkins. They blitzed from everywhere. Big Gay Ben did not know where they were coming from next. The linebackers, safeties and linemen were amazing. Jim Johnson looked like the smartest man alive. Brian Dawkins gave everyone who said he was old and finished a big FUCK OFF. To be a safety and play the way he does, with total disregard for his own personal well being, and to be 34 years old is incredible. If anyone ever sees Brian Dawkins on the street or in a restaurant, they should just walk up to him and thank him for being alive. That's the truth.

That is a big win against a team who was supposed to be one of the best teams in the NFL. The Eagles did it with only Booker and Buckhalter for almost the entire game as their running backs. Also, I would like to give Andy Reid credit. With your team up by 6 points with under three minutes to go in the game and in field goal position, you RAN THE BALL three times in a row. It could be the first time that has ever happened. You needed to run the ball and you did. I was simply amazed.

That Eagles' victory, accompanied with a huge Phillies win and a Mets loss made Sunday, a pretty nice little Sunday. Also, the U.S. beat Europe for the Ryder Cup, which is the most exciting golf you could ever watch. It's just something about the U.S. beating Europe that makes it that much more exciting.

I would also like to point out that USC started a defensive back that was arrested for a felony resisting arrest last week against Ohio St. Also, 41 Notre Dame students were cited for underage drinking including two football players, and some lacrosse and soccer players. But it's no big deal because it's not Penn State. I can only say so many times how I'm sick and tired of people complaining about Joe Paterno not controlling his program when it happens everywhere. These are 18-23 year old kids on their own for the first time in their lives with a bunch of people their own age. Of course they're are going to act like idiots. Not one coach in the country has complete control over their program. Everyone acts dumber in a group of people. Mob rules every time and the mob is always an idiot. All I'm saying is Joe Paterno is the all-time wins leader in college football again and anyone who questions his control over his program should just shut the fuck up already. He has earned the right to do whatever he wants. He made that program and he's not going to ruin it.